Wednesday, January 30, 2008


Being a man is tough. I think this is not a new fact, but it is a fact which is extremely important to acknowledge today.

In my interminable funk, it seems that I'm at a turning point. I've been sitting around, waiting for somebody to notice how miserable I am, while time passes and nothing changes. I'm coming to realize that nobody can take charge of my life except me.

Men today are told to be vulnerable, to be open, to share their feelings. These are not bad ideas, in themselves. But if taken alone, they produce wimps; "girly men." No - this must not happen to me. My vulnerability needs to be applied with wisdom; my openness needs to be secure, and my feelings need to be balanced by my actions. Often this means I need to sacrifice the selfish validity of my own suffering to be the husband, father, and man God calls me to be.

We men are told repeatedly not to be the authorities in our homes, but to be partners in the mission of raising a family. I am now beginning to see the danger in that statement. In any partnership, one must lead. This does not negate the contribution or input of the other partner, but it's only natural that one will select the course upon which the two sail. When men abrogate that responsibility in favour of the latest Dr. Philism or Oprahology, they do their families a great disservice. We need to be strong, we need to be leaders, we need to call the shots and bring our wives and children closer to Christ.

Does that mean that reasserting myself as the spiritual and temporal head of my household will be a seamless transition? Not in the least. Does the difficulty of the task permit me to sluff it off? Not at all.

It's time to be a man.